ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
So yeah, don't be alarmed when you come home after work to find me eating cookie dough out of a margarita glass with a knife and watching The Little Mermaid. It's been one of those days.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
It's 2:10 am I am sprawled on the floor of the kitchen drunk and eating cold chicken wings come help
My purse is like an anchor I can't move I am sliding around like an over turned turtle send help
This floor is really dirty send a maid if you can
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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