My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
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