Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
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