Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(702): View more from Nevada

Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??

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(201): View more from New Jersey

Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.

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(847): View more from Illinois

i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song

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(425): View more from Washington

he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"

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(201): View more from New Jersey

yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!

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(540): View more from Virginia

About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.

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(209): View more from California

So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.

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(845): View more from New York

man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...

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