So bad night, ended up beating off to porn and eating Keebler elf cookies.... at the same time :-(
Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
