I puked a lego.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He's spent his last 3 years working at Urban Outfitters. No, I'm not sad I missed out on a life of mustaches, the dollar menu and shitty scarves.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
