i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
