shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I incognito puked under the VIP table. Did Jersey proud.
DON'T BE A PUSSY. ONLY 1/3 OF THE WORDS IN YOUR LAST TEXT WERE MISSPELLED, WHICH MEANS YOU NEED 2/3 MORE SHOTS.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I cannot for the life of me remember why I am holding this rabbit.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
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