you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
he said he wanted to butter my pancake. i thought it was sexual, but he went downstairs and made pancakes. i need to stop dating fat guys.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
