she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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