im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
I'm pretty sure last night was the first time I've seen someone drink beer-soaked paper towels. Ever.
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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