Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
If I die young bury me in satin. And make sure there's a taco bar at my funeral.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
I need to be drunk within 15 minutes of getting home tonight.
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize