i always forget guys have bellybuttons
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I just woke up to three dick pics. Apparently in my blacked out state. I was asking for them as the new valentines day card.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
I just had to close my blinds so my neighbors wouldn't see me drinking a beer at 9 am. GO CHIEFS!
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Randomize
