I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Had to clear my browser history. I figured if she used the search bar and her name came up, it might be a little creepy.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
