Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
