so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
It says a lot about the way my life is going right now that 'there's no shit in your house' is fucking good news.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
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