That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
