shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I have tasted many bathrooms
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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