Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Hey, you gotta think, is this REALLY the penis you wanna see for the rest of your life? THINK!
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
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