why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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