Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
