if i can run in heels then i can drive
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
well when do great stories at the expense of people's relationships become a bad thing?
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
Randomize
