Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
