Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
To put it in a frame of reference with which you're familiar, it was like making out with a golden retriever.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
