When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
we went outside for a smoke and when we came back in you were ptfo on the floor holding the phone to your ear. Pizza pizza was on the line.
Randomize