omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Had to immediately delete the Bevmo email because I can't even look at an email about alcohol right now.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
