i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
