guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
