hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Randomize
