Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Randomize
