Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
