Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Apparently being drunk on a southwest flight and yelling "TURNUP" during take off is looked down upon in this state.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I really wish you were home bc youre the only friend I could ask to use an at home waxing kit on my vagina. I need you.
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
