what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
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