? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
