i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
I'm playing drinking games with a boy who looks like Liam Hemsworth. I think I'm fine.
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
Randomize
