Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize
