Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
