I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I knew I was in the wrong bar when "I have a daughter your age" was some random's pick up line.
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I told him I tried to eat a stranger's sandwich while I was drunk. Mildly disappointed but he realizes he has me for a kid.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
