I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
Will you fuck me while I eat my burrito though? I'm kind of hungry.
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
