i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
