I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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