Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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