He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Randomize
