i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
im having a threesome with these popsicles
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
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