Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
