They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize