Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Apparently, "please don't I have to be in court tomorrow" is not a valid excuse for a girl to abstain from giving a massive hickey.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
I'M CUDDLING WITH MY CAT AND THAT GUY SENT ME A DICK PIC. UNANNOUNCED DICK PICS ARE TERRIFYING AND MY CAT WILL NEVER BE THE SAME
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
Randomize