My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize
