he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Randomize
