I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Trying to convince myself that everyone keeps staring at me because I'm pretty and not because of my hickies.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
Randomize