Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Randomize
