oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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